Remember the cult classic, “Mission Impossible?” The original television series was introduced in 1966 and featured an elite group of spies who comprised the Impossible Missions Force (IMF). Every episode began with a tape recorded message, challenging one of them with an “impossible” and dangerous task. “Your mission, should you choose to accept it…” The message ended with the ominous words, “As always, should you or any of your IMF members be caught or killed, the secretary will disavow any knowledge of your actions.”
Eeks! Both scary and alluring. The freaky formula kept viewers tuning in for an impressive seven-year run and became the basis for Tom Cruise’s most successful movie franchise ever.
We don’t think of our grandchildren as elite spies, at least not yet, but they do face impressive, scary and sometimes dangerous challenges as they grow. As a recovering “helicopter grandparent” my instinct is to shelter them. Over time I have come to accept the fact that this is not always best for them.
If they are to find their mission in life and their life’s passion, we need to relax - not remove - the guardrails and walk with them into the face of impossibility to help them accept three missions ahead of them…
Mission 1: Discover Where You Came From
In the earliest years this means Mommy and Daddy time. All of the firsts - first smile, first steps, first words - happen in the home and are cheered on by parents and siblings. If you are blessed to be a part of their lives early on, you will be there too, cheering and doting and loving and modeling.
Not until much later will they wonder about things and at three years old they will start to ask questions like “What? Why? Who? Where?” This is all part of them getting to know their world. You are one of the most important parts of that world. You are where they came from and now are a major force in leading them onward. You can make that journey more possible as they face impossible situations.
Set out with them on this journey sharing the wisdom you have gained, telling the stories you have lived and teaching the lessons you have learned. I often repeat my “When I Was A Little Boy” stories. I am still waiting for the dismissive eye-roll that signals, “Not again please, Grandpa,” but so far it hasn’t come.
As they grow older they grow more curious and interested in their past. In the teenage years that interest wanes as they find their own friends and their own way. As they become adults, the interest rebounds and they dig a little deeper into their roots. Every journey starts with a single step. Be there to take those first steps with them and they will be better equipped for what lies ahead.
Mission 2: Discover Who You Are
Did you know that the most popular baby names five years running are “Olivia” (for girls) and “Liam” (for boys)? Compare these to the most popular names 75 years ago: Mary and John.
So what. Names will come and go but identities - the little person behind the name - is forever. Although a child’s first learned response is to recognize his/her name, learning who they are is something different and way more important.
I don’t know if my parents struggled naming me. I do know that naming fatigue had apparently set it since they didn’t give me a middle name. At some point I learned that “Gregory” comes from a Greek word meaning, “watchful one.” My children can tell you that it says a lot about my hovering ways when they were younger! My name was probably a coincidence, but your part in shaping the identity of your grandchildren can be intentional and long-lasting.
They are not who others say, they are or even who their parents or we want them to be. God has made them for a purpose and has a plan for their lives. Always point out their strengths and point them to their Maker, their Creator and their Friend.
Mission 3: Discover Where You’re Going
In Alice in Wonderland, Alice comes to a fork in the road and seeks the advice of the mysterious Cheshire Cat. "Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?"
"That depends a good deal on where you want to get to," replied the Cat.
"I don't much care where--" said Alice.
"Then it doesn't matter which way you go," said the Cat. ""If you don't know where you're going, any road will take you there."
As I look back I can see the way God used the twists and turns along the road to shape me and bring me to where I am now, but at the time they were just turns with unknowns around the corner.
When Aiden took off across our neighbor’s backyard, I had no idea where he was going… until I saw the bucket truck! Rather than call him back I decided to follow closely behind as he toddled toward the unknown. Mission possible!
Did you hear his repeated, “Wow’s?” Every mission in their young lives will be filled with Wows and holes along the way. Follow close behind them, share the “Wow! moments and point out the holes along the way. They will get there.
Aiden...spotting out a big bucket truck...Boys should/need to be adventurers...good for you, grandpa..